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FORT CAMPBELL, Ky. — Signs of the season have been everywhere at Fort Campbell High School over the last couple of weeks: a student soloist sang the Carpenters’ “Merry Christmas, Darling” at the annual holiday concert, a big tree sparkled in the cafeteria under the Screaming Eagle emblem of the 101st Airborne Division, and thousands of parents were deployed yet again in Afghanistan.
It is nothing unusual for Alexandra Alfield, a 17-year-old senior whose father, a Special Forces soldier, has been gone since August and for six of the last nine years. “I do miss him,” she said, “but I’m just so accustomed to it.”
As President Obama considers how quickly to withdraw the remaining 66,000 American troops from Afghanistan, the parents of Fort Campbell students are still going off to war.
Nearly 10,000 men and women from the 101st Airborne, a third of the active-duty troops based here, are either in Afghanistan or getting ready to go. Still more parents here have been deployed with units like the Fifth Special Forces Group and the 160th Special Operations Aviation Regiment, known as the Night Stalkers, whose members piloted the helicopters in the raid that killed Osama bin Laden.
That has made the high school, which is run by the Defense Department and is one of only four secondary schools on military bases in the United States, something of a window into the pain, pride and resentment felt by the families of the all-volunteer military force, which has borne the burdens of 11 years of war.
The high school, which has about 700 students and is open to any 9th to 12th grader who lives on the 100,000-acre post along the Kentucky-Tennessee border, is by definition physically and psychologically cut off from the world outside the gates. But at no time is that sense of isolation more acute than now, when many of the students’ parents are deployed while the rest of the country’s interest in Afghanistan has moved on.
“No one really cares,” Tyisha Smith, a 19-year-old senior, said of the outside world. “Your father goes, gets deployed. War — it’s normal. It’s not like a big deal that we’re still at war.”
But Ms. Smith said she was struggling to manage the pressures of her final year in high school while her father was away and she was living with her stepmother. The reality of his deployment with the 101st Airborne is never far away. “It’s starting to hit me that there’s a possibility that he could die,” she said. “I just hope he comes home.”
School administrators point to a bright spot: not as many parents are gone this year as there were at the height of the Iraq and Afghanistan wars, when nearly everyone in the school had a parent deployed and the post was a virtual ghost town. But that hardly makes the modest one-story school typical.
A strict dress code bans jeans and T-shirts, so students wear tucked-in collared shirts with khakis or dark pants. Presidents turn up a lot: Mr. Obama spoke at the post in May 2011, and George W. Bush visited three times while he was president. Vice President Joseph R. Biden Jr. met earlier in 2011 with the Fort Campbell High School football team. And the death of a parent is something to be mourned but overcome.
Only months after his father was killed in Afghanistan in June 2008, Josh Carter, a starting linebacker, helped lead the Falcons to their second of three straight state championships.
“My dad would want me to keep going,” Mr. Carter, now a student at Western Kentucky University, said in an interview over the summer. Administrators say that perhaps five other students have lost parents in the wars in recent years. Many other parents have been wounded or have received a diagnosis of post-traumatic stress disorder.
The students readily call their school a “bubble,” both comforting and claustrophobic, because of the dangers their parents face. “If you went to off-post schools, you couldn’t exactly talk to a teenager because they wouldn’t understand what you’re going through,” said Larissa Massie, a 17-year-old senior whose father is home but has had two deployments to Iraq.
By Stephen M. Silverman
12/24/2012 at 07:35 PM EST
"He had a great life and he enjoyed every moment of it and he would encourage others to do the same," son Adam Klugman said of his father, who had lost his voice to throat cancer in 1980 and then taught himself to speak again through breath control.
With Tony Randall on ABC's adaptation of the smash Neil Simon play and movie of the '60s, Klugman played sloppy Oscar Madison from 1970 to 1975 to Randall's Felix Unger, and though they really were an odd couple, offscreen they were adoring friends. Randall died in 2004.
Born in Philadelphia, Klugman started acting in college, and his film credits included the all-star courtroom drama 12 Angry Men. On Broadway he starred as the love interest Herbie in the original production of the quintessential backstage musical, Gypsy, with the legendary Ethel Merman.
Klugman's wife, actress-comedian Brett Somers, costarred on The Odd Couple as his ex-wife Blanche. According to the AP, they married in 1953 and had two sons, Adam and David, and had been estranged for years at the time of her death in 2007.
Besides their sons, Klugman is survived by Peggy Crosby, whom he married in February 2008.
TOKYO (Reuters) - Uncertainty over whether U.S. lawmakers will strike a deal by an end-of-year deadline to avert a severe fiscal retrenchment undermined the yen and bolstered Japanese shares on Tuesday in low volume, with many participants away on Christmas holiday.
The dollar rose to a 20-month high of 84.965 yen early on Tuesday in Asia, as Japanese markets caught up with global investors who had reacted overnight to incoming Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe's weekend comments that raised the pressure on the Bank of Japan.
During a meeting on Tuesday with officials from Japan's major business lobby, Keidanren, Abe reiterated calls on the BOJ to conduct bold monetary easing to beat deflation by setting an inflation target of 2 percent.
The head of Abe's coalition partner said on Tuesday the coalition party and Abe had agreed to set a 2 percent inflation target and compile a large stimulus budget to help the economy return to growth and overcome deflation.
The yen has come under pressure as a result of expectations that the BOJ will be compelled to adopt more drastic monetary stimulus measures next year.
The dollar was expected to stay firm this week as investors repatriate dollars, and as the U.S. fiscal impasse is likely to continue to sap investor appetite for risky assets and raise the dollar's safe-haven appeal.
"The dollar is seen relatively well bid, with all focus on the fiscal cliff," said Yuji Saito, director of foreign exchange at Credit Agricole in Tokyo.
"Negotiations may be carried over the weekend, but markets still expect a deal to be struck by December 31. It is unthinkable that the U.S. will risk driving its economic growth sharply lower by not agreeing to avoid it."
U.S. lawmakers and President Barack Obama were on Christmas holiday and talks were unlikely to resume until later in the week.
House of Representatives Speaker John Boehner failed to gain support for a tax plan at the end of last week, raising fears that the United States may face the "fiscal cliff" of some $600 billion in automatic spending cuts and tax increases set to start on January 1.
Japan's Nikkei stock average <.n225> resumed trading after a three-day weekend with a 1.1 percent gain, recapturing the key 10,000 mark it ceded on Friday after Boehner's failure sparked a broad market sell-off and the Tokyo benchmark closed down 1 percent. The Nikkei was likely to be supported as long as the yen stayed weak. <.t/>
"Ongoing optimism about the weak yen is lifting hopes that exporters' earnings will be better than expected," said Hiroichi Nishi, general manager at SMBC Nikko Securities.
Analysts say a near-term correction may be possible as the index is now in "overbought" territory after gaining 16.2 percent over the last six weeks, hitting a nine-month high last Friday. Its 14-day relative strength index was at 72.34, above the 70 level that signals an overbought condition.
MSCI's broadest index of Asia-Pacific shares outside Japan <.miapj0000pus> nudged up 0.1 percent, driven higher by surging Shanghai shares, as most Asian bourses were shut for Christmas.
The Shanghai Composite Index <.ssec> soared over 2 percent to five-month highs as investors bought property stocks on mounting optimism about the sector. Taiwan shares <.twii> jumped 1.3 percent on gains in technology and financial shares.
Asset performance in 2012: http://link.reuters.com/muc46s
2012 commodities returns: http://link.reuters.com/faz36s
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U.S. HOLDS 2013 KEY
Goro Ohwada, president and CEO at Japan-based fund of hedge funds Aino Investment Corp, said investors were likely to focus on economic fundamentals and the United States for cues on investment direction in 2013.
"There is a feeling that an investment strategy based on economic fundamentals may finally work next year, with asset prices more closely reflecting fair value. The problem is, we don't know yet which asset is a better bet than others," Ohwada said, adding that oil and gold appeared to be near their highs.
Naohiro Niimura, a partner at research and consulting firm Market Risk Advisory, said commodities and energy prices will likely move in tight ranges in 2013, with investors eyeing political events, including the U.S. fiscal cliff outlook, Italian parliamentary election set for February 24-25, and Germany's elections in September.
"The macroeconomic policies taken this year around the world to support growth are expected to result in a moderate recovery in 2013 to reduce an excessive downside risk to prices. This will likely keep commodities, gold and energy prices near their highs," Niimura said.
(Additional reporting by Ayai Tomisawa in Tokyo; Editing by Edmund Klamann and Daniel Magnowski)
RIYADH (Reuters) – The editor of a Saudi Arabian website could be sentenced to death after a judge cited him for apostasy and moved his case to a higher court, the monitoring group Human Rights Watch said on Saturday.
Raif Badawi, who started the Free Saudi Liberals website to discuss the role of religion in Saudi Arabia, was arrested in June, Human Rights Watch said.
Badawi had initially been charged with the less serious offence of insulting Islam through electronic channels, but at a December 17 hearing a judge referred him to a more senior court and recommended he be tried for apostasy, the monitoring group said.
Apostasy, the act of changing religious affiliation, carries an automatic death sentence in Saudi Arabia, along with crimes including blasphemy.
Badawi’s website included articles that were critical of senior religious figures, the monitoring group said.
A spokesman for Saudi Arabia’s Justice Ministry was not available to comment.
The world’s top oil exporter follows the strict Wahhabi school of Islam and applies Islamic law, or sharia.
Judges base their decisions on their own interpretation of religious law rather than on a written legal code or on precedent.
King Abdullah, Saudi Arabia’s ruler, has pushed for reforms to the legal system, including improved training for judges and the introduction of precedent to standardize verdicts and make courts more transparent.
However, Saudi lawyers say that conservatives in the Justice Ministry and the judiciary have resisted implementing many of the changes that he announced in 2007. (Reporting By Angus McDowall; Editing by Kevin Liffey)
Internet News Headlines – Yahoo! News
MOSCOW — The orphans’ faces can be called up on screen, their photos the size of postage stamps, along with a few data points and a note about their personalities, often just a word or two.
Kirill P., age 6, from Rostov in the south — hazel eyes, brown hair — wears a sweatshirt with dragons on it and is described simply as “sociable.” Angelina F., 16 months, from Khabarovsk in the Far East — gray eyes, brown hair — is actively developing an interest in her surroundings and “responds to any caring and affection.”
Maksim N., who just turned 11, is “mobile, restless, outgoing, likes to play games.” This is Russia’s “federal database of orphans and children without parental care,” a publicly available electronic repository of the forlorn and forgotten — more than 118,000 of them.
Child-welfare advocates say that it is orphans like these who are likely to be hurt most if Russian lawmakers succeed in banning adoptions by Americans — a move intended as retaliation for American criticism of Russian rights abuses. The advocates say a ban would end up further fraying a disastrously overwhelmed foster care and orphanage system here.
“Members of Parliament today say, ‘Russia Without Orphans,’ ” said Boris L. Altshuler, the chairman of the advocacy group Right of the Child who also serves on a Kremlin advisory panel, his voice sputtering in anger as he described the incongruous slogan of a bill that would make it harder to find homes for the children. “They know the slogan. The motto is very good, but there is nothing in their minds behind it.”
The bill’s rapid advance, in less than a week, has ignited an emotional debate here, with critics of the ban using the moment to focus attention on Russia’s troubled child protection system, even as supporters say they are trying to keep children out of foreign hands.
More than 650,000 children are living without parental supervision in Russia, according to statistics maintained by the Ministry of Education and Science, with more than 500,000 in foster care and more than 100,000 in orphanages — including the children in the federal database, which is available to prospective adoptive families, even though some of the children are not eligible for adoption.
By contrast, the Children’s Bureau of the Department of Health and Human Services in the United States has reported only about 400,000 living without parents, and only about 58,000 living in institutions or group homes, in a country with a population more than twice Russia’s.
In a telephone interview, Mr. Altshuler described the proposed adoption ban as the latest in a long series of bad policy decisions related to housing, education and social services, resulting in a system that actually encourages parents in financial trouble to cede custody of their children to the state, at least temporarily.
While more Russian children are adopted into homes in the United States each year than any other foreign nation, the overall numbers are relatively small — fewer than 1,000 out of 3,400 international adoptions in 2011. More than 7,400 were adopted by Russian families that year, according to the education and science ministry.
Still, Mr. Altshuler said a ban would be devastating. Some of Russia’s orphanages are badly overcrowded, with children institutionalized throughout their young lives, and many are ill-equipped to deal with the wide array of physical and mental problems common among the children, including fetal alcohol syndrome and congenital disabilities.
“A thousand kids per year will not go to the United States and will stay in Russian institutions with all the tragic consequences,” he said. As for members of Parliament, he said: “They are cannibals. They kill the country and they kill the children.”
Supporters of the ban say the United States government has not done enough to protect adopted Russian children and has not lived up to an agreement on heightened oversight that went into effect on Nov. 1. Though there is a strong nationalist streak in their arguments, occasionally ugly cases have generated international attention: including a 7-year-old boy sent back to Russia alone by his adoptive mother in Tennessee in 2010.
Yekaterina F. Lakhova, a member of Parliament and sponsor of the ban, said that years of working on child welfare issues led her to conclude that the international adoption process is overly profit-driven, and she said Russians should take care of their own.
“If the country is self-sufficient, if it believes in itself, you have to do it here,” Ms. Lakhova said, in an interview published by the news site PublicPost. “No normal, economically developed country gives away their children. I am a patriot of Russia.”
In many ways the insistence by some officials that Russia should handle its own child welfare echoes efforts by President Vladimir V. Putin to restore Russia’s standing as a world power after the decline following the collapse of the Soviet Union.
By Howard Breuer
12/23/2012 at 06:00 PM EST
State police personnel lead children to safety away from the Sandy Hook Elementary School
Shannon Hicks/Newtown Bee/Reuters/Landov
"This tragedy is so deeply affecting the national psyche, reminding us of 9/11, because of its assault on Norman Rockwell's vision of America," psychiatrist Carole Lieberman tells PEOPLE.
Friday was proclaimed a national day of mourning for those lost a week ago, with a moment of silence called for at 9:30 a.m. Eastern time, as 26 churchbells rang in Newtown and elsewhere. In addition, First Lady Michelle Obama sent an open letter of condolence to the town, saying the entire nation "is holding you in our hearts."
But how do those directly involved with the tragedy find the strength to cope?
To do that, family members who lost loved ones need immediate counseling and to maintain their normal routines. They also need to draw support from other affected families who can relate to what they're going through, says Dr. Stephanie N. Marcy, a psychologist at Children's Hospital Los Angeles.
"I think the people on the ground are feeling a sense of hopelessness because there is no way to justify what happened," Marcy says. "They need to be around other people who have experienced and understand it. If you were all involved together, you can empathize and grieve together."
In many of these families, the remaining children might have survivor's guilt, she adds.
"They rethink what they did that day and wonder if they in some way contributed to the death of a sibling, or they wonder, why did I survive?" Marcy says.
Therapists will need to explain to kids who lost a sibling that their "false belief that they should have been able to prevent it is not correct," adds Marcy.
Children at Sandy Hook may also have Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and will need therapy, Lieberman says.
"Kindergarteners and first graders don't need to be told about it unless you think they will hear it somewhere else. For older kids, you have to get to know what they know, answer any questions they might have, and be truthful – but don't say too much," Marcy says. "Say that a person who was having problems, that was sick, went into a school and injured some people for no particular reason. Tell them it would never happen at their school."
"Yes," she adds, "it could happen anywhere. But there's no point in letting your child think that, [because] they may be flooded with fear."
For the adults and children across the country who have been vicariously traumatized, Marcy says, "We need to regain our sense of control, because this type of event makes us feel completely helpless."
Lieberman adds that Americans "are also feeling a generalized anxiety, a fear that no place is safe anymore. They need to talk to friends and family, get involved in championing causes that make society better, to volunteer for charities, and to get psychotherapy if the sadness and anxiety persist."
CHICAGO (AP) — It happened after Columbine, Virginia Tech, Aurora, Colo., and now Sandy Hook: People figure there surely were signs of impending violence. But experts say predicting who will be the next mass shooter is virtually impossible — partly because as commonplace as these calamities seem, they are relatively rare crimes.
Still, a combination of risk factors in troubled kids or adults including drug use and easy access to guns can increase the likelihood of violence, experts say.
But warning signs "only become crystal clear in the aftermath, said James Alan Fox, a Northeastern University criminology professor who has studied and written about mass killings.
"They're yellow flags. They only become red flags once the blood is spilled," he said.
Whether 20-year-old Adam Lanza, who used his mother's guns to kill her and then 20 children and six adults at their Connecticut school, made any hints about his plans isn't publicly known.
Fox said that sometimes, in the days, weeks or months preceding their crimes, mass murderers voice threats, or hints, either verbally or in writing, things like "'don't come to school tomorrow,'" or "'they're going to be sorry for mistreating me.'" Some prepare by target practicing, and plan their clothing "as well as their arsenal." (Police said Lanza went to shooting ranges with his mother in the past but not in the last six months.)
Although words might indicate a grudge, they don't necessarily mean violence will follow. And, of course, most who threaten never act, Fox said.
Even so, experts say threats of violence from troubled teens and young adults should be taken seriously and parents should attempt to get them a mental health evaluation and treatment if needed.
"In general, the police are unlikely to be able to do anything unless and until a crime has been committed," said Dr. Paul Appelbaum, a Columbia University professor of psychiatry, medicine and law. "Calling the police to confront a troubled teen has often led to tragedy."
The American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry says violent behavior should not be dismissed as "just a phase they're going through."
In a guidelines for families, the academy lists several risk factors for violence, including:
—Previous violent or aggressive behavior
—Being a victim of physical or sexual abuse
—Guns in the home
—Use of drugs or alcohol
—Brain damage from a head injury
Those with several of these risk factors should be evaluated by a mental health expert if they also show certain behaviors, including intense anger, frequent temper outbursts, extreme irritability or impulsiveness, the academy says. They may be more likely than others to become violent, although that doesn't mean they're at risk for the kind of violence that happened in Newtown, Conn.
Lanza, the Connecticut shooter, was socially withdrawn and awkward, and has been said to have had Asperger's disorder, a mild form of autism that has no clear connection with violence.
Autism experts and advocacy groups have complained that Asperger's is being unfairly blamed for the shootings, and say people with the disorder are much more likely to be victims of bullying and violence by others.
According to a research review published this year in Annals of General Psychiatry, most people with Asperger's who commit violent crimes have serious, often undiagnosed mental problems. That includes bipolar disorder, depression and personality disorders. It's not publicly known if Lanza had any of these, which in severe cases can include delusions and other psychotic symptoms.
Young adulthood is when psychotic illnesses typically emerge, and Appelbaum said there are several signs that a troubled teen or young adult might be heading in that direction: isolating themselves from friends and peers, spending long periods alone in their rooms, plummeting grades if they're still in school and expressing disturbing thoughts or fears that others are trying to hurt them.
Appelbaum said the most agonizing calls he gets are from parents whose children are descending into severe mental illness but who deny they are sick and refuse to go for treatment.
And in the case of adults, forcing them into treatment is difficult and dependent on laws that vary by state.
All states have laws that allow some form of court-ordered treatment, typically in a hospital for people considered a danger to themselves or others. Connecticut is among a handful with no option for court-ordered treatment in a less restrictive community setting, said Kristina Ragosta, an attorney with the Treatment Advocacy Center, a national group that advocates better access to mental health treatment.
Lanza's medical records haven't been publicly disclosed and authorities haven't said if it is known what type of treatment his family may have sought for him. Lanza killed himself at the school.
Jennifer Hoff of Mission Viejo, Calif. has a 19-year-old bipolar son who has had hallucinations, delusions and violent behavior for years. When he was younger and threatened to harm himself, she'd call 911 and leave the door unlocked for paramedics, who'd take him to a hospital for inpatient mental care.
Now that he's an adult, she said he has refused medication, left home, and authorities have indicated he can't be forced into treatment unless he harms himself — or commits a violent crime and is imprisoned. Hoff thinks prison is where he's headed — he's in jail, charged in an unarmed bank robbery.
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Online:
American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry: http://www.aacap.org
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AP Medical Writer Lindsey Tanner can be reached at http://www.twitter.com/LindseyTanner
LONDON (Reuters) - World stock, commodity and currency markets were steady on Monday, with tensions over the U.S. budget dispute subdued by a holiday lull in Europe.
With a number of stock markets including in Germany, Italy and Switzerland closed for the Christmas holiday, the FTSEurofirst300 <.fteu3> was flat at 1,138.92 points by 1045 GMT and the MSCI index of global stocks <.miwd00000pus> was virtually unchanged at 339.97. The British, French, Dutch and Spanish markets were open for shortened sessions only.
Activity in other assets was also subdued, with spot gold edging up from a four-month low
Markets were left in limbo on Friday when President Barack Obama and U.S. lawmakers suspended talks until after Christmas on avoiding $600 billion of spending cuts and tax increases that threaten to send the economy back into recession.
Although there is no official date for talks to resume, the two sides still have few days after Christmas to find a compromise before the January 1 deadline when the measures start to take effect.
Most political experts and economists expect a deal of some form. If one isn't, the "fiscal cliff" could wipe as much as 4 percent off U.S. GDP next year, choking the global recovery before it gets going.
"The fiscal cliff is the only thing that is important for markets at the moment," said ABN Amro economist Aline Schuiling. "We were hoping the festive spirit would get everyone together and a deal would be done, but Obama has now gone to Hawaii for Christmas, so it looks like we'll have to wait."
YEN WEAKNESS
Most European bond markets were already shut for Christmas but one of the few to be open was in Britain where benchmark 10-year yields ticked higher.
Currency markets were also largely quiet. Against the backdrop of the fiscal cliff uncertainty, the dollar eased 0.2 percent versus a basket of major currencies while the euro climbed back above $1.32.
The major mover was the yen, which neared a 20-month low versus the dollar, after incoming premier Shinzo Abe renewed pressure over the weekend on the Bank of Japan to adopt a 2 percent inflation target.
The dollar was up 0.2 percent on the day at 84.42 yen. Chartists said the dollar needed to overcome 85.05 yen, its 200-week moving average, for it to make further gains.
"There has been some pretty significant yen selling all through the night and into this morning," said Peter Kinsella, currency strategist at Commerzbank.
"It is very noticeable we have not seen any retracement or dip in dollar/yen at all. The market is really saying they are convinced on yen weakness, and that is what we are going to see for the remainder of this year and in the course of next year."
STRONG FINISH
Trading on Wall Street was also expected to be subdued when it opens later, also for half a day. Futures pointed to the S&P 500 opening down 0.6 percent and the Dow Jones and Nasdaq 100 starting down 0.4 percent. <.n/>
The uncertainty over the U.S. budget is threatening to sour what has been a strong second half of the year for equity markets. The FTSEurofirst 300 is up 20 percent since June while the Euro STOXX 50 <.stoxx50e> has gained almost 30 percent. Both indexes are set to post their best annual performances since the post-Lehman crisis bounce of 2009.
Investors are now showing increasing appetite for European stocks. EPFR Global data reported that flows into equity funds have increased for the last 19 weeks.
"This year has been a year of transition, and now it's time to turn the page and move on, to start picking stocks again for the long term, companies exposed to the emerging consumer in places like Asia and Africa," said David Thebault, head of quantitative sales trading, at Global Equities.
Others warn that the euro zone crisis may still have some bite left, however. Elections are due next year in Italy and Germany, while Spain's government, companies and banks need to refinance huge amounts of debt.
"Policymakers in Spain will not be looking forward to the start of the year and January will probably be quite volatile in Europe," said ABN Amro's Schuiling. "The funding in the first quarter for Spain will be the test... Its deficit is now roughly the same as Greece's."
(Additional reporting by Blaise Robinson in Paris and Anooja Debnath in London; editing by David Stamp)
Hmm. Teen mom from Teen Mom Maci Bookout was on Twitter the other day when she received a tweet from the father of her child asking her to marry him. No lie! Ryan Edwards from Teen Dad — Huh? What’s that? There’s no such show? He’s just on Teen Mom? Oh, OK — was all “Maci Bookout marry me!” And Maci was all “Ur s–t got hacked BRO! Outta ur mind haha.” And then Ryan was all “would never let that happen.” Maci asked what he was playing at and then Ryan said, omg, “It means that I want to get on one knee and tell you how much I love you.” Whoaaaa! That’s huge! Maci, marry that boy! He just proposed to you sort of maybe on Twitter! How romantic! Also you have a four-year-old child together so maybe it would be easier to be married, I dunno, for like legal reasons or something? But no. Alas. Maci responded to that saying “Twitter is not the place. Ima kill u.” So wait. If we’re going to take Ryan’s sweet Twitter proposal seriously, which we’re going to, I guess that means we have to take Maci‘s Twitter death threat seriously, too? Police, go arrest Maci. As much as it pains us to say it. Fair’s fair. Ryan, you can marry Maci while she’s in jail. Bentley, which is the name of the child that made all of this, literally all of this, possible, can come live with Ryan while Maci serves her sentence. Sad that such a sweet moment had to end so tragically. But that’s Twitter for you. [Us Weekly]
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Haha/Ew: Lindsay Lohan said she would not kiss Charlie Sheen when they were filming their scene for Scary Movie 5 because “his mouth grossed her out.” Yes. That’s actually the headline of the TMZ post: “Lindsay REFUSED to Kiss Charlie … Because His Mouth Grossed Her Out.” Man. In a thousand years, when the aliens are sifting through our bones and ashes to learn about the civilization they just annihilated, they’re going to somehow find a list of TMZ headlines and will shake their big gelatinous heads and figure they were right to wipe us out. TMZ headlines. Wooftie. But back to Lindsay, I don’t blame her. You couldn’t pay me a trillion dollars to kiss Charlie Sheen. Why not just pay me ten bucks to lick a wall at the Port Authority? Honestly. Here’s a good line from the story: “we’re told BOTH parties had to sign releases that they didn’t have cold sores.” Which, holy hell, guys. If you have to do that to film a stupid movie, maybe it’s time to pack a suitcase and more to Uruguay. Like, chuck this rotten life aside and say see you soon, Montevideo. You’d be so much happier. It’s supposed to be great down there. It’s time for a change, you guys. Don’t be another TMZ headline. [TMZ]
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Naomi Campbell ate at the new Beatrice Inn on Wednesday night, hobbling in on crutches and in a leg brace after she tore a ligament or something. She ate with Vogue editor Carlyne Cerf de Dudzeele and a photographer named Steven Meisel. At a table nearby, Vera Wang, Calvin Klein, and Donna Karan were all having dinner. Excuse me?? What happened next? Did they all go to a screening of Unzipped and then to the after party, where the Spin Doctors were playing? Was everyone talking about the last MTV Top 20 and if Idalis is better than Daisy Fuentes? I mean, what? Naomi Campbell walks into a restaurant and Calvin Klein, Donna Karan, and Vera freaking Wang are eating nearby? Was Betsey Johnson the busboy? Was Cindy Crawford sweating on the line as a cook? Honestly. I didn’t realize they were still filming Prêt-à-Porter. Good grief. [Page Six]
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Did you know that Kelly Clarkson is engaged to Reba McEntire‘s stepson? Because she is. Kelly Clarkson is engaged to Reba McEntire‘s stepson. So engaged, in fact, that Reba thinks the two might elope. Or at least she “wouldn’t be surprised” if they did. Because some big wedding wouldn’t really be Kelly’s style, apparently. Reba said as much: “That was never my deal and I don’t know that that’s Kelly’s either.” Oh, man. I wish Reba would say “that was never my deal” in a sentence about me. What a nice life Kelly Clarkson has had. Famous from a TV show and then actually famous, respectably famous. And now she gets to marry into Reba McEntire‘s family. It’s all coming together for Kelly Clarkson, guys. Just in time for the end of the world. [Us Weekly]
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Jessica Biel has been doing a tour of Broadway recently. First she went to see Book of Mormon and afterward tweeted thusly: “Book of Mormon was too good for words . . . Except for words like amazing and best musical I’ve seen in forever and incredible!” Which is a totally boring thing to say about Book of Mormon. Here’s the skinny on that show: It’s not that good. Actually, forget the italics. It’s just not that good. Just because a Broadway musical swears and says “scrotum” a lot, does not mean it is being daring or irreverent. It’s a wan show that actually totally gives Mormonism a pass and instead averts your gaze to freaking Africa, which it just makes fun of for two hours because who’s gonna fight back on that one? Toothless and dim, that show. Entertaining, but toothless and dim. Whatever. Jessica Biel then went to go see ScarJo in Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, which good heavens I didn’t know that was in previews already. That is a nightmare. She’s playing Maggie the Cat, ScarJo is. Can you believe that? Well, believe it or not, she is. And Jessica Biel went to go see it. Tellingly, no tweets about that. Ha, not a single damn tweet about that heap. Anyway, all this playgoing has Page Six wondering if J.Biel might be hungry for a Broadway show of her own. Which would be a fine mess, wouldn’t it? Unless they do a Seventh Heaven stage play, something really serious and earnest, in which case I would walk Ms. Biel to the theater myself. But otherwise? Nope. Get thee back to the Stealth 2 set, Biel. Return to where you belong. [Page Six]
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